only 4 more days...

yesterday on facebook i whined.....i was hot, my kids were not really liking each other, and i was soooo tired of my same clothes.  then my amazing friend posted this saying: 

 someone else is happy with less than what you have.

ouch....

so i settled in for the remainder of the afternoon checking my heart.  now, honestly, the clothes adventure has been far easier than what i thought it would be.  God graciously provided decent weather until this last week when we reached mid 90's and without ac in our home that gets a tad bit annoying and frankly i'd prefer to live without clothes at all!   

but, in the midst of not thinking too much about it, i've also learned some great things.  like, i waste a lot of time getting ready in the morning.  well, really in just standing in front of my closet pondering what will look good on me that day.  then i change my mind.  then i leave the house all flustered over what i have on not being just right.  you know what?  not once have i had those thoughts.  i just put my clothes on and go.  there is a freedom in that....and a great sense that God cares more about my heart, than my outward appearance.  does that sound like something in 1 Samuel, something about annointing king david?  hmm...guess in preparing that lesson for summer creator camp i got to learn it too.

i also have realized how much i think i need.  you know, that shirt i might wear one day.  or those shorts that don't really fit, but if i could just lose another inch off my thighs they might.  well, that takes me back to the fact that i didn't lost weight during my food month because again, God cares more about my insides and so must i.

today i worked with my hubby.  this was the 3rd day this month.  i wore the same outfit each time.  he never once commented.  last friday, i wore my skirt to a minor league baseball game with 5/6 graders, yesterday i took my kids bowling in my little gray skirt.  why?  it was way too hot for my jeans.  saturday i went to the grocery store in a dressy shirt because it was the only one clean and my cut off sweat shorts because they were the only clean thing.  did you catch i went out?  in public????  you know what - i felt pretty good!

now....i do miss several of my shirts and can't wait to have a few more shorts or skirts to wear.  but i do know that a lot of my stock is going, going, gone....!!!!

so....what else have i learned.  i really do have a lot and most people that have less are pretty happy with what they have.  i think it is those of us that have a lot (global standards) but feel like we are missing out on the american dream that aren't happy what what we have.  we feel this need for more.  

we feel like we are being cheated out of something and we like to blame someone for that.  usually the government.  BUT, what if i just stopped and enjoyed what God has chosen to give me.  God is bigger than my tax refund check.  God is bigger than the american dream.  God is the bigger than the new couch and carpet i'd love to have.  so why not just enjoy Him? enjoy His blessings.  be mindful of his gifts.  instead of pursuing the american dream, maybe we should start pursuing Him.  since i still haven't found in scripture where christians are entitled to the american dream i'll just keep on letting God poke around in my little world and rock the boat! 

what to wear?

i used to ask myself that question all the time.  in fact, many mornings i would blankly stare at my closet.  sometimes i'd try on several different things.  i tend to dress for my mood, which can vary from sassy country girl to wanting to look elegant to hiking attire to trendy to flirty....my mood can be known to change during this process from flirty to frumpy girl!

 

so when i had to narrow down my closet to 7 items i was a bit overwhelmed.  honestly, even though i had a month to think about it i chose not to.  i did by a skirt in preparation.  shorts have kind of become something i hate to wear because i can't find any that i look good in.  i love this little gray skirt and have plans to make some more for myself.  anyways....

 

i started on monday. so monday morning i just pulled out some items and said here we go.  then i realized that this isn't practical in northern indiana in june.  i selected:  jeans/capri's (i roll them up for capri), gray skirt, pink/grey striped tee, white elbow length cardigan, aqua tee, yellow blouse, white tank for under yellow blouse, purple shirt that i got at a garage sale, and a gray tee.  this shouldn't be too bad.  flip flops and tennis shoes.  i managed to get to 9 items. 

 

then i had to go weed our garden.  nothing on my list was really appropriate so i decided that i should be able to have one work in the yard/exercise outfit.  then the temps dropped to like 50 degrees so i decided to add in a fleece.  

still - not too bad right?  so now, being 7 days into it.  i do find it rather freeing.  i really don't have to give much thought to what i am wearing.  just put on whatever shirt i didn't wear yesterday, or which ever one happens to be clean and off i go.  what you need to understand is that when i volunteered at the school on fridays i was always sure to not where the same thing back to back fridays.  i think i'm starting to see a trend with some weird obsessions of mine.  ironically, as i'm preparing for Creator Camp i'm studying 1 Samuel 16:7 which clearly states that the Lord doesn't look at our outer appearance, but at our heart.  gee....i think God is revealing that my heart isn't as pretty to look at as i once thought.  

why do i get so consumed in what i wear?  why does it matter if i repeat clothes?  i whined about needing a sweatshirt and added one in.  you know what?  there are people who are cold all the time and while they may want to  "whine" about being cold (i use whine as my term - not what they really do) they don't have the luxury of going to their closet and saying, "gee, i didn't know it was supposed to get cold, i think i'll add in a sweatshirt!"  they don't have one to add in.  

 

i had chosen discover as my word of the year.  God is definitely helping me discover the hurt in the world, my pride, my feeling of entitlement, my ease of life, and my discomfort.  but mostly God is helping me discover the sin in my heart and that confession and change is hard, but oh so good.....