17 days in

amazing!  i'm 17 days into eating 10 items.  it has been crazy, hard, frustrating, amazing, simple, freeing, revealing...all of those things.  and i'm not yet done!

i intend to be real.  it has also been 13 days since i've blogged so it is high time to bring you into my little world of 10.  day 5 hit hard.  i mean tears hard.  my body hurt something crazy.  i mean muscles, joints, stomach.  everything.  i texted a dear friend and told her i was done.  she said i wasn't and to push through the detox my body was likely going through.  so i did.  and boy am i glad i pushed through those 3 days!  i think i knew God was telling me to push through when we had our life together group day 5.  we eat dinner together.  none of them knew of my crazy plan yet.  i had fixed pork roast because i had a large one to get rid of and they bring the sides.  i had leftover plain rice and grilled chicken in the fridge for me with some freshly shredded cheese (as a side note - why have i ever bought preshredded cheese!!?!?!!??).  anyways....fully prepared to be jealous over dinner our amazing cultural cook showed up with fried rice like he had said (has ingredients not on my 10!)  AND cheesy rice!!!  like a gift from God was that dish!!!

okay - so moving on, the next week wasn't too bad.  i still craved chocolate every day about 2 and 8 pm, but for the most part was loving my rice, potatoes, spinach, berries....i decided to try a green smoothie.  they are all the craze right now aren't they?  using my 10 i threw in spinach, almond milk, and berries.  bleh....had to choke it down.  texted college roomie...she sent me back her recipe.  tried it - bleh....then she sent me a text and said add peanut butter....gross, but why not,it IS on my 10!!  OH MY WORD!!!!!!!  i can't get enough of them!!!  yummers:)  thank you sweet Jesus!

dear hubby made me an egg with cheese on a whole wheat bagel thin.  OH MY WORD!  again, thank you Jesus!

while i've chatted on and on about the food, which has become rather tasty i might say, let me draw in to my heart.  

day 7 was a sunday.  we were singing in church.  nothing new....then the worship leader read psalm 139:13-16 about being fearfully and wonderfully made.  being knit together by God.  being known and created by God before anyone else knew.  then we sang about our wondeful maker.  God broke me right there....all of a sudden i was picturing a hungry child.  so often we see it as questioning why God would create them and make them hungry.  or we say we need to get birth control to these people.  but all of a sudden it struck me that a irresponsible man and woman didn't create that hungry child -God did.  God knows that child.  God knows that child's need!  AND God knows there are His people here on earth that can be His hands and feet to that child.  tears...many tears.  then i was thinking about girls in sex trade.  the exact same thoughts.....then the widows.....again, same perspective.  it was so cool to see God move my heart.  honestly, i think it was because i have been stripped away of some of my "freedoms."

then a few days later i was out taking a walk.  i had shared with a couple of friends prior to this whole adventure a specific area i was praying for and asked them to pray for me.  when i asked them to pray it was for God to change someone else.  why do we go there???  anyways, on that walk, which i took to avoid eating a big piece of chocolate, God completely opened my eyes to MY sin in that relationship.  i tried to argue back, but it didn't work.  i mean it was huge and humbling and awful and amazing.  i confessed to God.  i knew the prayers to change the person were out of line.  it was me that needed to change.  so after confessing to a friend, i went humbly to that relationship and asked forgiveness.  i was scared, very scared.  but it was amazing to talk it through and i feel like my eyes have been opened.  soooo cool!  

i can say, i have cheated a few times, kind of.  one day i tasted the homemade salsa i was making the family to make sure i didn't need to add anything else.  one taste and it was perfect, darn it.  no second taste.  one day i ate a raisin by mistake.  i savored it though:)  i had a rasberry chai made with almond milk because it had berries, tea, and almond milk.  may have been a bit loose for 10. 

i can't believe i am nearly done with this month.  it seemed to drag by at first...now i'm not sure i want it to end!!  okay, yes, i do a little.

i'm thankful for the many things God is teaching me.  i'm thankful for an amazing husband that keeps me going and lets me babble about it all.  i'm hoping the kids decide to stop telling me there is nothing in our home to eat and that they see how blessed they are.  i'm hoping God keeps teaching me.